Yu-Gi-Oh Manga: 167 Infected!

Not according to the doctor I had a visit with yesterday. Despite the strange waterlogged feeling and sound in my right ear for the past couple of days, he said it looked somewhat pink, but altogether NOT infected. Not that I'm not happy I haven't got a miserable ear infection, because I'm pretty stoked about that bit. I'm just a little sour that my dumb body wastes my time by tricking me into thinking there's something wrong with it, and subsequently spending an hour waiting to be told that it's just trolling me.

Jerk-ass body...

And speaking of jerk-asses that like to troll people, Haga yucks it up about how it's been a long time since he last saw Jonouchi in Duelist Kingdom. Jonouchi stares with some apprehension, knowing that even if Yami managed to beat Haga in the first duel at the Kingdom, there's no denying that Haga used to be Japan's champion at Duel Monsters. Anzu says that Jonouchi shouldn't even give Haga the time of day, not least of all because Haga threw Exodia into the ocean on the way to Duelist Kingdom. She is 100% correct, and as all correct women are, she is promptly laughed at by the guy she is discrediting as he expresses his gratitude that a girl so cute remembers him.

#HerToo. Fuck you, Haga.

Jonouchi guesses that the bug freak is only here for one reason, and it's not catching flies. Haga says that Jonouchi is smarter than he looks, pointing and grinning as he challenges Jonouchi to a duel right here and now, unless Jonouchi is afraid of course. He had heard that Jonouchi went pretty far in Duelist Kingdom, but Haga is convinced that Jonouchi is only as powerful as a locust's fart up against him. Two things: 1. that simile was painful, and 2. Jonouchi getting into the finals of a tournament you couldn't even get through your first duel in is a pretty good indication that your assessment should be flipped. But facts are beyond the delusional, and Haga is convinced he'll crush Jonouchi, and then Yami afterward. Suuuuuuuuuure. Whatever you say...

Bakura asks Jonouchi if he's going to fight Haga, and when Jonouchi shouts an affirmative, I have the brief hope that he means with his fists rather than cards. But hey, at least I know fantasy from truth and am quickly able to realign myself with the reality that this manga is still all about cards. Anyway, Jonouchi says that it's karma for Haga to meet back up with him to get his ass beat, because he goes around stealing cards from kids. Haga is beyond amused that Jonouchi actually believes such a story from the squirt he told to con him. Yeah, so idiotic to think that you would steal a kid's cards, Haga. No, you just hire them for jobs for which you never issue the promised payment and spray them in the face with poison.

Haga pictures the Parasite Paracide he knows is in Jonouchi's deck now and wishes for Jonouchi to consider it a gift. There's some part of me that really likes the impossible idea that this is some weird self-awareness on Haga's part that his plan will inevitably backfire because that's what always happens in duels involving Yami and his posse. That part of me really wants to write a fanfiction about the personal hell these villains endure knowing that no matter what they do to win, it will turn out to work in their opponent's favor instead. Would anyone read that?

Jonouchi is raring to go while Haga laughs, but Anzu warns him that Haga is obviously up to something, saying that she doesn't like that strange chuckle Haga has going. Jonouchi tells her that a true duelist doesn't run away from anybody, because that's what cowards do. Or it's what people who have critical thinking skills do when they see no point in giving a piece of garbage any satisfaction of acknowledgement. That too. He says he's dueling for the courage he wants to give Shizuka in this match too, which... well, we've already talked about why that's a load of horse shit.

The guy paid for her operation and she seems surprised he even exists...

Honda explains to her that Jonouchi is at a card game tournament in Domino City right now, fighting to give her courage. She hangs her head, thinking about Jonouchi fighting for her in disbelief. AGAIN, he paid for her operation, so I don't see what's so shocking about this.

Meanwhile, Ryuji is confused and wants Honda to explain to him how Jonouchi's personal accomplishments in a tournament are supposed to help SHIZUKA feel stronger too. After all, if she's going to learn to be brave, she has to do this herself, right? I'm in agreement with Ryuji here, but Honda thinks that he and I just don't get it, man. Honda insists that people sometimes have to help each other out, and not only CAN people get courage from others, it's the ONLY way. Leave the sermons to the pastors, won't you, Honda?

Ryuji scoffs, crossing his arms defensively as he mumbles internally that this is what he came here to find out. However Shizuka is on his side. She says that she's the only one who can decide to be brave, but she's scared. Shizuka trembles when she admits she's afraid that the bandages will come off and everything will still be dark, so she'll never get to see her brother again. She sobs softly as a reaction to her pessimistic thought, while both the strange boys look on awkwardly, Ryuji scratching his temple.

In an attempt to lighten the mood, Honda whips out some clothes he brought with him, having packed the hand-me-downs from his sister just in case Shizuka didn't have a change of clothes on hand. He flaps them, saying that he's not sure if they'll look good, considering they're a bit loud. Shizuka keeps her head bowed, so Honda gets serious again, inviting her to go see her brother with him again. He tells her that she doesn't have to take off the bandage if she's not comfortable, because he and Ryuji will be her eyes for the trip.

Shizuka puts on a politely surprised expression (judging by the exclamation point above her head, since we can't see her eyes, obvi). Honda wants to let her know about one more thing, regarding an amendment to the statement that Jonouchi was fighting for her.

Okay, I can tell we're going to have a problem with this girl's expressions all looking the same until she finally shows us her eyes.

Ryuji suggests they get going, and a single tear escapes the underside of Shizuka's bandage as she mumbles that she wants to see her brother. Then she loses her shit altogether and screams that she wants to see Jonouchi. Calm your shit, child. Honda begins to help Shizuka to her feet, telling her that the train leaves soon and they need to hurry, while Ryuji knocks on the door to request the nurse get Shizuka's clothes for her. Honda encourages Shikuka one more time to get going with them.

And this whole time I'm wondering how old Shizuka is, and why she would be allowed to be checked out of a hospital by two teenage boys with no family ties. Is this a Japan thing or a KT-Doesn't-Think-These-Things-Through thing?

The next panels show decks being inserted into Duel Disks, and it's no secret who's getting ready for an overly complicated game aided by overly complicated machinery. Haga suggests he and Jonouchi bet TWO puzzle cards in addition to their one rare card, which Jonouchi is down with. Of course, the fact that he's out of the tournament if he loses both his puzzle cards in this duel is not lost on him. But, no time to dwell on that when there's glaring to be done so the comic can make clear who's dueling whom here! And then the start of the duel is called.

Bakura warns Jonouchi not to let down his guard and Anzu just tells him to beat the beetle-face. Sugoroku has his analytical face on when he considers the fact that even in knowing Haga has an insect deck, there are a ton of different strategies he could use. Jonouchi declares he gets to go first and asks if Haga is ready before slapping his Panther Warrior card from his hand onto his Duel Disk. He characterizes it as a super tough four-star monster that won't lose to any bug. Haga retains his smug grin and chuckle.

Haga puts a card face down, which Jonouchi hates because he can never know if it's a spell or trap or something equally nefarious, I'm sure. Then Haga summons a monster called Skull-Mark Ladybug in defense, which is just what it says on the tin: a ladybug with a skull-shaped mark on its back. Jonouchi is NOT impressed, mocking Haga for always choosing bugs for his monsters and asking if he EVER tries anything else. Haga isn't the least bit ashamed, though, thinking that once Jonouchi gets a taste of this super insect strategy, he'll have to boast through six feet of earth. And given the track record of characters literally trying to kill others, I'm not counting on that being hyperbole.

Jonouchi plays another monster, Little Winguard, with little wings everywhere from its oversized hat hiding its face to its boots. It also has four stars, which is the first thing Haga notices about it, and assumes this indicates Jonouchi's intention to summon a higher level monster on his next turn. At least for a moment, his grin turns into a grimace and his eyes narrow. Jonouchi moves into his battle phase by making his Panther Warrior leap forward and cut the Skull-Mark Ladybug cleanly in half. This has Anzu and Bakura cheering for Jonouchi, but Sugoroku shoots that shit down immediately.

Jonouchi is in angry disbelief that Haga gained MORE life from the death of his ladybug, silently chastising himself for not reading the fine print. Are you ABLE to read the opponent's cards in the hologram version of this game? Because I've always just assumed that those overlaid card pictures on the panels were for audience benefit and not actually visible to players.

I wouldn't beat yourself up, though, Jonouchi. We can't ALL be card-catalogues like Sugoroku. A state of being that creates a long monologue in his head, by the way. He thinks about how four-star bugs don't generally have a lot of attack points, but special abilities to make up for that, working well in combos. Sugoroku mentally warns Jonouchi to watch it if he don't want to get his ass beat.

Haga summons a new monster, the Pinch Hopper, again in defense. He encourages Jonouchi to come at him bro and make his day and similar stuff, all with his smug grin back in place. Sugoroku knows that even if Jonouchi kills the Pinch Hopper, Haga will have a replacement for it in no time. I guess that's the benefit to working with insects, being so numerous and all. Jonouchi is already irritated about what a pest Haga is, but finds consolation in the fact that he can summon a high-level monster by sacrificing the two he has on this turn. Yes, that will work so well in eliminating your current problem - the fact that the special abilities of Haga's deceased monsters keep giving him benefits in the game.

But Jonouchi isn't wrong that the Jinzo in his hand will give him immunity to Haga's future traps, and has high attack points as well. He draws exuberantly on his announcement that it's his turn and his eyes nearly pop out of his skull at the face of his new card.

Follow-up question: what are those tentacles doing to that guy's FACE? I'm starting to regret taking a closer look at that card than I did before...

Jonouchi recoils from the unfamiliar card that is obviously not his, wondering what it could possibly be doing in his deck. Haga giggles, judging by Jonouchi's look of disgust and confusion that he drew the foreign card. What gets Haga even more grin-y than ever before is the fact that apparently you're forced to play the card when it's drawn, no questions asked. So, a hologram is automatically forming of the card despite how the Duel Disk shouldn't have the capacity to read it if it's not touching the device. Jonouchi stares in alarm, and then horror when the tendrils from the two dimensional image start wriggling out into three dimensions. Haga's eyes bug in his anticipation at seeing those tentacles make Jonouchi's monsters their hosts, which it wastes no time in doing, shooting toward each while they look on with fear. Jonouchi is unclear what this frightening business is, but Sugoroku knows exactly what the parasite card is doing. A tentacle rises from the depths of Panther Warriors agape maw with cracks and growls.

As Kim Possible once said, it's a vivid image. But hey, don't take our word for it.

Gross.

Jonouchi observes how nasty his monsters have become and Haga responds that as long as he has a parasite card out there, Jonouchi's monsters will be infected with them. While Jonouchi's eyes widen in shock, a clueless Bakura says he just doesn't understand why Jonouchi would put a card like that in his deck. Anzu responds with the "duh" statement of the reality that it isn't anything Jonouchi put there. Is Bakura going to pull his head out of his ass anytime soon?

Sugoroku now realizes that he was right about that squirt, and Jonouchi accuses Haga the creep of doing this to his deck. Haga mocks Jonouchi for coming to this conclusion way too late, and brags that a brilliant strategist starts strategizing long before the battle. Yeah, that's not so much STRATEGIZING as it is a MILITARY OCCUPATION AND INVASION. Just ask Poland in 1939.

Haga continues to shoot off his mouth, claiming his deck has the ultimate power over insects and he can make them do whatever he wants. Sounding a bit rapey today, Haga. Because of the parasite possession of Jonouchi's monsters, the game considers them insects as well, and after asking Jonouchi if he understands this, Haga says that there's no way he can win. Jonouchi's heart pounds and his teeth grind.

Should have just flipped Haga off and walked away, dude.

So, what did I think of this chapter overall? I think KT realized really fast his mistake in centering Jonouchi's motivation on Shizuka again, and is attempting to hang a lampshade on that here. He's essentially presenting us with an answer to the question we never asked about the situation: "Is it possible to get courage from others?" versus "Is this motivational problem a bit backwards?"

And yet, strangely, it works. He's essentially given us a new way of looking at the potential value of Jonouchi's motivational attachment to his sister's condition. I don't think it works strongly, and can be a little fragile as a concept, but it does provide at least a little value to the situation. Whether or not one can draw strength from others is a worthwhile question that is oft debated with many a meme online. You've got the Ryuji view of the only one who can be responsible and in charge or your emotions is you, and the Honda view that deriving strength from others is the only way to go. It might be really interesting to see Shizuka stuck between the two viewpoints and trying to reconcile them. If KT is willing to let her be at least a little active, anyway.

I have little hope for what Haga is pulling in this arc, though. I don't see how a "parasite card" like his could even work in the game, let alone the Duel Disk. Yes, I did just propose the hypothesis that the Duel Disk is tapping into that ancient magic that allows the ACTUAL monsters to be summoned, but Kaiba and the producers of the cards don't know that. How could they create something that would force the player to use it when they could just as easily take advantage of the distance in the duel the machine affords and not even bother?

How could someone think a card like that would be useful in a game like this to begin with? I suppose if one wants to turn all their non-insect cards into insects this would be helpful, but then why not just get insect cards to begin with and skip a step? And the compulsory nature of the card kind of suggests that the person playing it wouldn't want to, so it stands to reason that the developers of this card WANTED the card to be inserted into an opponent's deck without their knowledge. It's like rohypnol for card games.

That's seriously fucked up.