Yu-Gi-Oh Manga: 253 God in Hand!!

No thank you. Not only does having a god in hand seem like WAY more trouble than fortune, I'm already holding onto too many odds and ends, and have been for a long time. Since moving into a TINY apartment, I've been trying to figure out where to put all KINDS of things that I've been carting around with me for years. Some stuff I've been able to just USE, like the craft supplies I've hoarded and had a little time to play with in the depths of quarantine. But there are objects hanging out in various corners that I'm not sure what to do with, like books I haven't gotten around to reading yet, and nick-knacks I can't bring myself to get rid of, and discs for computer games that can no longer run on my newer model machines.

Maybe I can get a shadow box in which I can artfully arrange a bunch of crap I'm far too attached to.

I still question whether this card should affect the card it's pinning for THREE turns, considering we've been reminded over and over that spells only work for one turn on the big bad gods, but I also question my limited knowledge of the mechanics of this game, so the only thing I don't doubt is that there's room for a lot of error here in either flawed perspective.

Kaiba is smiling when he thinks that Yami's escape from instant death won't stop his eventual defeat. The only thing that can stop THAT is Yami's privileged status of most important person to the plot. The digital audience continues to chant Kaiba's name, but Yami doesn't let that stop him from pointing and stating that the sacrifices remain since Obelisk's summon has been thwarted, and the effect of Soul Exchange ends. As a result, Queen's Knight and Kuriboh return to either side of Yami, Kuriboh's eyes swirling with its dizziness, I'm guessing because it was just released from its sacrificial whirlwind. It's an adorable detail.

Looking down at his pinned god, he internally laments that he has to wait three turns to have the chance to use it again. Mokuba pisses and moans on the sidelines how stupid Yami has taken the lead. Never mind that his precious brother was the one who spent 1000 of his own life points on a dead-end move. That's irrelevant to the current situation, clearly.

The level of foreboding here is exactly equal to the level at which Kaiba has been impressing me over the entirety of the semi-final arc.

Kaiba says his turn is over, telling Yami it's his move now, so Yami draws a card and takes stock of the two monsters he has on his side of the platform. He knows he'll have enough to summon Slifer if he can just get one more monster out there, but unfortunately he's not drawn Slifer yet. He looks down at his Duel Disk in desperation, as if silently asking how it could betray him so, which is frankly hilarious. Yami notes the attack power of the X-Head Canon floating next to Kaiba; 1800 attack, which is more than either of his own monsters, so he can't destroy it just yet. He settles for playing a card face down and keeping his monsters in defense for the time being, ending his turn on this meh note.

Viewing this as a clear sign of weakness, Kaiba says that if Yami keeping [sic] running like this, his three turns will pass in an instant. An instant packed with endless trash-talk, apparently. He announces his turn, drawing another card while he thinks he doesn't NEED three turns to kill Yami with his god. I would wonder how THAT works, but I'm sure Kaiba won't be able to keep the secret long. Boy just has too high an opinion about his "genius" strategies.

And speaking of arrogant boys who can't seem to shut their mouths for more than a few seconds...

Koolaid Man over here busting through the light wall of the coliseum to confirm that Yami and Kaiba are indeed going at it. And not so subtly edging back into the spotlight ;). He asks what the score is, and mutters about Kaiba's Obelisk being pinned, Yami not being able to attack either, and the question of which one of the two will be able to summon their god first. Thanks for summing that up for us, other!Marik. You can go now.

Nope. He's just GOT to keep blabbering on, asking who will win, knowing that death awaits the victor at his hands. No matter who takes that honor, though, other!Marik reserves the right to kill Yami regardless, chuckling at the prospect. Well that's a given.

Meanwhile, Kaiba summons a monster - Y-Dragon Head, a shiny floating mechanical wyvern. As Kaiba laughs, about the fact that the name and creature don't match, I'm sure, Yami repeats its name in his head. The similarity between the names of Y-Dragon Head and X-Head Cannon has not escaped him, and he's starting to consider the possibility that they might be two of a kind.

I gotta say, when I woke up this morning, I never imagined I would see a gunner robot riding a wyvern today. It's super weird. Fun, but weird.

XY-Dragon Cannon, with its 2200 attack points, apparently isn't as weird as it gets either. Kaiba says there's one more part of this bizarre machine, and if he plays it, they'll all three achieve their ultimate fusion. Or ultimate awkwardness. Yami has a lengthy epiphany about the move Kaiba is pulling here; the fusion monsters combine their attack and elevate out of the opposing forces attack power, while also being able to break back apart into sacrifices for Kaiba's god card once Lightforce Sword's effect ends. In other words, Yami's fucked. By Yami's wide-eyed, alarmed estimation, this is the perfect strategy to summon a god card that Kaiba has been planning all along. It certainly has an elegant simplicity about it, but I still think Yami is over-selling this. I mean, come on, it's KAIBA. Let's not give him more credit than he deserves. He'll do THAT all by himself.

Indeed, Kaiba theatrically tells his XY-Dragon Cannon to aim...

Really? Kaiba didn't go for the more intimidating monster on Yami's left instead? Then again, I'm sure he hasn't forgotten the last time he faced off against that little kaleidoscoping shit. I sure haven't.

Yami groans as he raises an arm against the virtual blow-back, but though he knows his defensive monsters protect his life points, he also knows that Obelisk has a whole 4000 attack points and it will reduce his points to zero in an instant with just one shot. Kaiba laughs, asking Yami if he's afraid, if Obelisk being released in three short turns makes him quake in his boots. If it does, the fact that it's actually just TWO turns now should have Yami downright pissing his pants.

Then he suggests with a teasing smirk that he might not even have to wait THAT long, and Yami sweats like he's been trapped at the center of the earth while we zoom in REAL close to his horror-stricken eye. It should be convincing me that he's already been backed into a corner and is honestly worried about Kaiba's next move. But it's not. I wonder why?

Kaiba smugly declares that the god cards will always end up in the hands of the ultimate duelist, sustaining Yami's strangely uninspired anxious expression, but prompting other!Marik's agreement, with the caveat that the ultimate duelist will be him and not Kaiba at all. Short and unnecessary interjection about who deserves the big prize done and over with, Kaiba tells Yami to watch his spell card, "Voice of the Heavens". Be careful Yami, he's about to pull something, despite nothing being up his sleeve.

Yami does indeed look on edge as he considers the name of this card. Kaiba explains that it allows him to enslave one of Yami's most powerful monsters, and all he has to do is say its name. Crap, it's the old "is this your card" gag. Should have told Yami to watch his WALLET. Kaiba makes a big deal of drawing out his calling of the name of his desired card, and the only thing I'm surprised by is that he didn't ask Mokuba for a drumroll. When he finally gets around to saying "Slifer the Sky Dragon", Yami recoils, growling in denial. But Kaiba insists that Yami take his god card from his deck and hand it over, NOW, manic expression, clawed grasping fingers and all.

Man, Yami is swallowing a lot of bitter pill today, isn't he? Only to wash them down with lemon juice.

They meet each other in the center of the platform, analog-style. Kaiba mocks a concerned tone as he observes just how deep in Yami's deck the card was while Yami sullenly holds Slifer out to him, and suggests that it was unfortunately not going to make an appearance in this duel buried so deep. Yami remains silent, but his face maintains its unhappy look. Other!Marik grins from his place in the wall, apparently very pleased that Kaiba now has two god cards. Kaiba himself asks Yami if he understands that the gods obey only him at this point, and laughs with raucous abandon.

Until of course he sees Yami smile back at him and say that they shall see about that. This brings Kaiba back to sober reality in a hot second. Yami says that Kaiba must have been thinking the EXACT same thing he was, because the moment Obelisk got himself free, he was planning on using his OWN face down card. Kaiba is the picture of alarmed and speechless, but Yami thinks Kaiba knows it's "THAT" card.

Yes "THAT" card. Kaiba is in disbelief that Yami is using the hand exchange spell card, in an indignant fluster as his brother cries out in dismay over the setback. Other!Marik just chuckles from his position in the fake wall. Yami claims that on the day he played that card against Jonouchi, he inherited part of Jonouchi's duelist spirit. He inherited the REST of that spirit when a few minutes ago, no doubt.

What? Too soon?

Kaiba growls while Yami steps back up to him and shows him his hand, sullen and put-out. But Yami is still ruminating, knowing that even now, he's not alone.

Oh, Kaiba? What was it you were saying about the god cards always ending up with the ultimate duelist? As usual, his foot is comfortably at home in his mouth.

So, what did I think of this chapter overall? I was reasonably impressed that the great pacing of the last chapter was only a little compromised in this one. It would have been maintained if KT hadn't felt the need to insert other!Marik and his unnecessary commentary into the flow. On the other hand, if he hadn't done that, he would have had to fill this space with Yami and Kaiba's dialog, since there weren't a lot of actions the characters could have taken in the meantime, and that would probably have been just as inane. Besides, it WAS kind of fun seeing other!Marik leaning out of that wall like he was the whole time, grinning like an idiot. The silliness of it was kind of endearing.

What is not endearing to me is Yami's poker thoughts. I haven't seen Yami look and think genuinely unsettled by the turn a duel was taking only to come out a couple of pages later with a sly smile and say that he's got a counter-strategy in a while, and I didn't miss it. Because this was done ad nauseum in Duelist Kingdom, I wasn't fooled by it here, and it just annoyed me. I want to feel like Yami is REALLY on the ropes, not that he's just so good at fooling everyone into thinking he is, even the audience. A character playing at being disadvantaged in a duel to the point of putting themselves into the role even in their own HEAD isn't impressive; it just gives the impression that the author isn't very good at knowing when to deny us access to a character's thoughts and when to direct a reader's attention elsewhere. I thought he had learned those lessons by now, because I know KT is capable of it, but for some reason he's fallen back on this old, tired habit.

But I will throw him kudos for Yami's final elaborations in the chapter. I mentioned before that Kaiba seems to be pulling a psychological trick by recreating a large audience like the one in Death-T, chanting Kaiba's name and producing the illusion that Kaiba had support while none of Yami's friends were there to cheerlead the way they usually do. Well Yami has thrown this back in Kaiba's face by his play of a card that recovered the autonomy of his best friend, implying that while his friends cannot be there for him physically, there is a part of them (specifically Jonouchi) that is with him right now. It doesn't matter what hollow holographic imitations of fans Kaiba conjures, Yami's still got real people out there with real connections that are not broken even by the bounds of distance, time, or death.

This shift in tone implies something a little sad, though - Kaiba has his brother, sure, but he had to create a coliseum with fake people in it just to sort of COMPARE to the amount of support Yami gets from real people. He's so confused by the relationships he sees Yami engaging in, and yet, he understands them enough to see a glimmer of power in those bonds, and essentially try to manufacture something like that for his own use. But just like his recreation of Yami's penalty game on him in their first meeting, he's missing a rather large part of the equation. He's missing the transformational growth that come from both a penalty game and a friendship - that part where he doesn't just get the benefits but he puts them in, too.

Poor, desolate Kaiba, forever churning out superficial imitations of life and experiences without ever actually being engaged and intimate with them.

Can't someone just PLEASE punch him in the face? JUST so he can feel something for once, and definitely not because I think he deserves it?