Yu-Gi-Oh Manga: 007 The True Face

Guess who's back? Back again? It's not Shady, so don't bother telling a friend. When I left off on my last review, I thought I might have detected the beginning of an overarching conflict that could draw this story out of the one-shot doldrums. There are plenty of one-shots still ahead of me, but I can see I'm coming close to hitting the first arc, though it only stretches across two chapters. I can still keep my eyes open for new developments in what I saw last time before then, so I'm going to squint real hard.

This title page is a lot more creative and revealing than the last, which I appreciate. The visual here is stark - behind Yuugi's innocent face is another picture altogether, and despite Yuugi's face being the one on top, it can easily be removed to reveal the one underneath. At this stage, we don't even know if Yuugi is aware of this other personality beneath his everyday persona. The puzzle analogy isn't perfect, but it's apt for what it has to get across.

I'm sure it probably has something to do with the actual chapter too, so let's get on to that. School has just let out and Yuugi is walking away from the building when Jonouchi calls out to him. Yuugi asks if he's going home, and Jonouchi doesn't seem to be interested in the idea. He's accompanied by Honda, whom we haven't seen since the first chapter. Honda looks like he has a bug up his ass about something, he's glaring so hard, and Yuugi shrinks away from him.

Apparently, Honda is in the habit of making Yuugi do stuff he doesn't want, including buying ecchi books. Why? It's not like Yuugi is more capable of getting them than Honda. In fact, he should be less capable, considering he looks like he's TEN. Besides, Yuugi makes it sound like he's done this multiple times, and if the whole damn manga up until now only took a week like the last chapter suggests, I think we would have seen him running Yuugi like an errand boy.

Continuity errors aside, it looks like Honda needs Yuugi's help with something else this time, though he's a lot less forthcoming about it. Jonouchi needs to tell Yuugi, and the moment he does, Honda protests.

What the hell did Yuugi do to you, dude? Besides dividing your best friend's time. And being an excuse for the first villain to target you and Jonouchi. And carrying your bag and buying you dirty comic books. Seriously, you'd think that would be a point in his favor.

Honda changes his mind without a visible reason, just like most people in this manga, but warns Yuugi about telling anyone what he's going to confide in him. Jonouchi insists that Yuugi is trustworthy, and Yuugi says he can keep a secret too, but Honda continues to look skeptical. Jonouchi decides to blurt out in Honda's stead that he's in love, which prompts Honda to go mental and lament that Jonouchi shouldn't have said anything. He grabs Yuugi by the throat and starts shaking him, barking about how Yuugi will begin laughing and teasing him.

Honda, he buys you softcore porn. If he hasn't laughed at you for that, he's not ever going to laugh at you for ANYTHING.

After Honda decides to stop strangling Yuugi for a reaction he didn't even show, the three of them stroll down the sidewalk. Jonouchi is relating the facts to Yuugi as Honda trails behind in embarrassment.

You hear that? She's so bland and indistinguishable from other girls that people identify her by her ribbon. HER RIBBON. Yeah, this is going to be a lasting romance. How much you wanna bet she won't show up again after this chapter?

While Honda gets his lovesick sigh on, Jonouchi calls him too stupid to come up with a way to tell Miho how he feels, and suggested that Yuugi could help him out. Well, if you're so smart, Jonouchi, why don't YOU figure out something to get her attention? Oh, I get it, you're foisting this on Yuugi because he's SENSITIVE. Gotcha.

And his grandfather has a "weird" game shop, which is the first place Jonouchi suggests to start searching for Miho's gift. Honda is acting like a little jerk when he hears about the game shop and tells Jonouchi to shut up, but I kind of agree with him. I mean, it seems to me that Jonouchi just wants an excuse to visit the shop himself, because what makes him think Miho would like anything in there? None of them know anything about this girl other than the fact that she's on the Library Committee and she wears a ribbon in her hair.

If anything, they should be heading to the bookstore, only knowing the library thing. Even then, they'd have to pick out a subject that might interest her, and that's a bust. Maybe ribbon-craft?

Yuugi agrees with the plan to check out the game shop, mostly because he wants to pick his grandfather's brain on the subject of what would be a good gift for Honda to give his crush. I'm sure the only thing your grandfather would think to give her is compliments on how her breasts have grown, Yuugi.

If you're wondering if I'm ever going to let that go? No, no I'm not. It's one of the first things we ever heard out of his mouth. First impressions and all.

When they arrive at the shop, Yuugi's grandfather actually DOES have another idea of what to give Miho, a tactic he used to snag himself a wife back in the day. Jonouchi is starting to doubt the validity of his idea as Honda whines like a broken violin for the umpteenth time. Dude, you're already there, just shut the fuck up.

That's actually not a half-bad idea, but Jonouchi bursts out laughing because he doesn't think it's Honda's style at all. Does anyone have a "style" for this sort of thing? We're not counting pick-up artists, who don't have style so much as a lack of respect for boundaries. Honda doesn't choke Jonouchi out for laughing like he did Yuugi in his imagined mirth, saying the gift is actually fine. Jonouchi is perplexed, even more so when Honda calls it perfect as a romantic gesture.

Honda pays a grinning grandpa for the puzzle, who says something about it working every time. I can't tell if this means the puzzle as a gift or just his sales pitch. Honda pauses as he realizes that he doesn't know the first thing about writing a love letter, and swings around to face Yuugi again, all sweaty as he demands Yuugi write it for him. Before Yuugi can answer either way, Honda grabs his hand and puts it on his chest, stating that it's hot because he's filled with burning thoughts he can't write down. Yuugi is confused as hell.

This manga sets off my gaydar more frequently than Free! Iwatobi Swim Club. That is until Honda starts choking Yuugi again, warning him not to let him down. It's strange to see Jonouchi being the voice of reason when he lunges forward to stop Honda, saying he's acting nuts.

Yuugi spends all night writing a love note from a violent crazy person to a boring mannequin, despite how he apparently thought it would be easy. Honey, just because you're sensitive doesn't mean writing love letters is easy. Especially when you have no knowledge or feelings of your own for the person you're writing to. In fact, that's probably why you came out with this mess:

He breaks up the most painful love message in the world and wraps it up in its box. His co-conspirators are waiting for him at school an hour early, and they all decide to leave the box for Miho in her desk. Honda gets a verbal confirmation from Yuugi that he wrote down all those hot, burning feelings of his as Jonouchi tucks the present into Miho's desk. No, Honda, he didn't, because no one can give your feelings about anything a fair representation except for you.

Why do you think I'm doing these reviews? Think anyone else is going to spew this snark?

Jonouchi announces that Elvis is in the building, or the Eagle has landed, or whatever. Honda's package has been slid into Miho's desk. Innuendo intended that time.Yuugi cheers and Honda collapses on a desk, needing a hamburger. Sure you don't want a cigarette instead? Hey-o!

I am the worst.

Hey, who's this? Could it be... an adult?? A person who actually holds authority in the school??

Ooooh, she's pretty! The teenage boys she's passing call her Chouno-sensei, and whisper about how hot she is, aside from the fact that her makeup is caked on a little thick. And the additional fact that she's so mean that she's constantly expelling students, fifteen in the past six months alone. They call her the "Expelling Witch," which actually works quite well as a pun in English. I wonder if that was intentional.

But no, I can't believe it! Look at her! She's got happy cheer! Look, she's talking to the Vice Principal so civilly, chatting about a "marriage interview" she had the night before. She says that the guy she was out with didn't deserve her, which, you know, comes off a little conceited, but I don't know what the date was like. When she ends the conversation to go to class, the Vice Principal comments about how her perfume is pretty strong, but thinks about how he would love to have a marriage interview with her himself. I would love that too; she walks around with her eyes closed all the time, how could you not want someone like that?

Back in the classroom, Jonouchi whispers to Yuugi about how Miho hasn't managed to find her gift yet, and Honda's looking nervous as hell. Jonouchi is making fun of his red face and fidgeting as Honda panics when Miho looks in his general direction. Yuugi just smiles, because he knows it will be alright in the end.

Meanwhile, in the bathroom...

WOAH. So, that happened. And supposedly because she's pissed off about being engaged in small talk about the date she had. Girl, if that information is so private, don't tell anyone that a date is happening in the first place. If you blab about every "marriage interview" you have, then of course people are going to ask about it in regular conversation. That's just how people talk to each other.

I'm assuming that a "marriage interview" is a self-explanatory term, but, just to be sure, I'm going to go look this up, real quick...

Okay, from what I read, marriage interviews are a little like blind dates, with the end goal of discussing the possibility of marriage in an informal way. Like most blind dates, this is usually set up by a go-between, and the families come too. So, is this woman bringing her whole family along to rag on these poor guys and their families?

Someone needs a new hobby, maybe one that doesn't have douchebag written all over it. The irony here is that while she's spent her life making fun of guys that wanted to bone her, those guys ultimately dodged a bullet. At the very least, they won't spend all their money replacing all the mirrors in their house when little miss priss decides to break them in a fit of irrational rage.

Her pride was wounded by small talk, but the hand she used to punch the glass appears to be fine. Not a scratch let alone a cut, which seems impossible to me, but okay. She tells her cracked reflection that it's all okay as she takes out some lipstick to touch up her precious face. Her worry centers around the stress making her skin oily and ruining it, so she needs to find a way to nip that problem in the bud.

Our first female villain HAD to have vanity out the ass, didn't she?

*Crickets chirp*

We're not getting another one, are we? This is the only female villain we get. Allow me a groan bemoaning the loss of potential here, won't you?

Chouno walks into the classroom with her bright, sunny mask on and commands the students to all stand up. Before they start doing school things like reading books and learning, she needs to take her frustration out on them.

Uh-oh, based on Yuugi and Jonouchi's reaction here, I'm guessing Honda's little gift is one of those things that is not allowed in this school. Balls. The only reason Honda isn't freaking out too is that he's already spent all his emotional energy worrying about whether or not Miho likes the puzzle. Speaking of which, she finally pulls it out of her desk with question marks dancing around her head. Honda puts his head on his desk.

Chouno is practically having an orgasm from the sight of how guilty and terrified the students are. She's ready to bring the banhammer down on these little brats; anyone who has items like condoms, cigarettes, lipstick... Wait, lipstick? The first two make sense, but, seriously, lipstick? You have lipstick, Chouno! Go expel yourself, asshole!

Instead of doing that, she wanders around the desks, checking everything on them out. When she gets to Miho's desk, she picks up the gift, thinking that she's found something good. Chouno asks what it is, and Miho tells her the truth - she has no idea, just found it in her desk. Honda, Yuugi and Jonouchi are freaking out, Honda most of all.

Chouno rips open the package to the horror of Jonouchi and Honda. She takes out the puzzle and begins assembling it on the desk at the front, because she notices the words on the pieces. She puts the pieces together pretty quickly, and begins reading the message out loud. Honda looks mortified and Jonouchi sorry for him as another student blurts out that the message is awful. Jeez, you don't have to be a dick about it, you dick.

Honda notices that Miho has her head bowed and is crying, ashamed. He curses the teacher for hurting his precious Ribbon-Chan, completely forgetting about his own discomfort. Chouno asks the class who wrote the note, and tried to start an "illicit" relationship with Miho. I don't know if "illicit" is a fair word to use here, because I'm having a hard time believing anyone in this school has ever gotten laid. Where does this woman think she's teaching, anyway, Neptune High School? If that were the case, you'd be better off searching among the staff for whoever wrote it.

Keeping her smile screwed tight, Chouno asks the real Slim Shady to please stand up, and she may go easy on him, but not really. Honda is blaming himself for causing Miho humiliation now, knowing the only way it's going to stop is if he confesses. He begins to stand...

Awwww! You guys! You got me all misty-eyed!

Jonouchi doesn't care if all the other kids are laughing at them, as long as Honda doesn't get in trouble. Honda doesn't catch on, though, because he was already on his way to standing up anyway, and he admits it was his feelings spilled all over the puzzle in ink. While Jonouchi is irritated with his friend's idiocy (the idiocy that he referenced at the very beginning of the chapter), Chouno says she's unconvinced that the puzzle could have been the work of three people.

Maybe they just want to share? I don't really blame her, because normally, one person would have been able to accomplish that. Considering the collective intelligence put into this project, though, I'd say all three of them were necessary.

Jonouchi denies that any of them are lying, so Chouno decides to complete the bottom portion of the puzzle where the name is. Boy, isn't it great that she didn't START the puzzle there? That would have been inconvenient, huh? As she finishes the puzzle, Chouno rants like the unstable moron she is about how she will expel the person whose name is signed, and how she's a teacher, so they can't fool her, ho ho!

Every villain needs a useless monologue, don't they?

Honda recites a farewell, nice knowing you speech in his head to Yuugi and Jonouchi, and Chouno is counting the pieces as they go into the puzzle.

Let the games begin!

... Except he's not challenging her. Chouno just keeps fitting the puzzle together as Yami remains silent, lambasting her in his head instead. He thinks about how everyone has a secret that they only want to share with the people who equal it in importance. Yami promises that the part of her that hurt his friends will be harmed and the truth will come out, just as the last piece pops into place.

But... Yami, you didn't challenge her to a game. Everyone ELSE gets challenged, why not her? This was a fitting punishment, knowing how she relied on her beauty to command attention and humiliate others, but that should have happened because she lost in a challenge, a shadow game, that she consented to. EVERYONE ELSE had to consent to that, but you just do it to her without any warning.

Sure, I mean, speaking out against a teacher in the middle of something like this would probably have gotten Yuugi expelled, and if he waited until after school, Honda would already have been expelled, so the damage would be done. But Takahashi has ignored stuff like this before when it suited him. In fact, in the last chapter, somehow the money for the materials that were destroyed at the festival booth just magically reappeared. I refuse to believe that he couldn't have thought up a way for Honda's expulsion to be gotten around.

After apparently suffering a penalty game without having even participated in a game beforehand, Chouno flees the classroom, telling the students that classes are done for the day and she'll murder their faces if she catches wind of them gossiping about her hideous face. Jonouchi and Honda exchange words about how weird Chouno's face had become and what a close shave they had, and Yuugi blinks in confusion over how classes are over early.

Honda decides to ask Miho out in person, and gets shut down hard. He slouches off, whining to Jonouchi and Yuugi, and the chapter has officially come full circle.

So, what did I think of this chapter overall? Well, I was really enjoying it up until the part where Takahashi just skipped the game and got straight to the punishment. Until then, the only thing I had to complain about was that the antagonist's motivation was her severe vanity. Seemed like she was Snow White's stepmother or something. I liked the subject matter - really, I remember what it was like to figure out a way to tell my crush that I liked him, and most of the time when I tried, I crashed and burned with rejection. I feel for Honda in this. The fact that he entered the chapter as somewhat unlikable just added to his humanization, so he felt real and relatable.

When it comes down to it, though, I HATED the fact that, instead of trying to find a way for Yami to actually challenge this villain like all the others, Takahashi didn't bother. I listed the obvious issues with a challenge, but I think they could have been overcome with some rearranging, or maybe by having the villain needing to obtain some higher authority's permission to go through with her expulsions. She didn't even have a title attached to her like the Vice Principal, so I don't see how she would have enough power to declare students expelled by herself. If Takahashi would have just put a little more thought into it, maybe he could have written in a game there.

I want to believe this isn't some sexist bullshit about how women can't game, or how men shouldn't challenge them. I really want to, but no matter how I look at it, that's how it seems. I could try to fool myself into thinking that this is just another way in which, per the example set in the last chapter, Yami is starting to go too far. It's going to take a LOT of convincing, though.